The Fifth Agreement: A Practical Guide to Self-Mastery (A Toltec Wisdom Book)

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Shortform note: In his book Talking to Strangers, Malcolm Gladwell explains that while we think we’re good at reading people, we’re actually terrible at it. We assume people are telling the truth and that the way they present themselves outwardly is an accurate and reliable representation of their inner feelings and intentions. But don’t we all occasionally hide our true feelings, tell half-truths, or mask our intent—and haven’t we gotten away with it? Why should others be any different?) Step 4: Be the Best You Can, Without Comparing

Once you arrive at the fifth step, you’re ready to move to the third stage of Toltec enlightenment—the freedom of control. In other words, since you’re no longer being controlled by beliefs you didn’t choose, it’s up to you to decide how to live. You have the freedom to choose the shape and tone of your subjective reality. I am two people: one that came into the world with a mission to share, the “real” me. After I got messages from all the people that helped me grow into an adult, I became the “virtual” me, a mixture of all those people's messages that I assumed were the truth. If you'd like to surrender the lies that keep you in bondage... study this book and try to live by its principles if it resonates with you. The goal is to live YOUR LIFE instead of the life of THE BELIEF SYSTEM. This is a practical guide to self-mastery. The Fifth Agreement advises us to search for our own truth, find out who we really are, and figure out what's really important. This process comes down to understanding that we've constructed the world and the expectations we have for ourselves. We've constructed beauty, success, achievement, intelligence, and so on.Shortform note: Another important thing to remember is that self-criticism typically doesn’t reflect reality. For example, psychologists note that those who self-criticize often feel that they receive less support from others, that they’re less attractive, and that they’re less happy than others. However, studies show that in most cases, these feelings don’t reflect their reality—instead, the tendency to self-criticize trains us to overestimate the negative aspects of our experience and underestimate the positive.) Be Impeccable with Your Word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering. The Third Agreement – DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS Critical thinking is something that needs to be taught and taken seriously, because the world is becoming increasingly complex, and the ground beneath us is constantly shifting. We need to learn to question our perceptions and our versions of reality. We need to interrogate our symbols and how we use language to represent ourselves and the world. And we need to listen. We need to listen to ourselves and to those around us. The Fifth Agreement is to see the world through our own belief systems, and then to look at how our beliefs shape our reality. Why do we accept the symbols around us as reality? And how have we been indoctrinated into accepting a "shared existence?"

We open by exploring their foundational principle—that reality is subjective—in Part 1.1, and follow that in Part 1.2 with a discussion of the nature of and path to enlightenment. In Part 2, we discuss the five “agreements,” or adjustments, the authors recommend we make in pursuing our personal freedom. For simplicity’s sake, we’ll call these the five steps on the Toltec road to enlightenment. Our Reality Is Subjective Don't make assumptions - ask open questions and clarify each aspect. Each person has a different understanding of each word. Love is important as an end result of the respect that we have for others and non-attachment to any knowledge we have gained from our infancy. However, it does not have much of a place as a motivating factor. In fact, as long as we live whatever dream makes us happy and respect others, what we do in life and say to others if of little importance. I don't buy it. Of course it doesn't fit with my Christian view of the world, as he says that we need to save ourselves and not rely on a Savior or anyone else. No more, no less. Each has to do his best, his own best. Each person must achieve according to his scale, not others. Each must try to find to find the best way to express his character, not to be a hero. It is not about beeing a hero, but a peaceful person and a productive one. With awareness, we recover the control of our story. That is the good news. If we don't like our story, we are the authors; we can change it.Be impeccable with your words - be kind and speak only what you truly believe. Spread joy and happiness. We often experience anxiety and confusion because our bodies are at odds with what's going on in our minds. And, as we grow older, life gets a lot more complicated. We are living in a dream that we artists are creating...we can take responsibility for our creation."

Social domestication programs us for a reward-or-punishment's system. To avoid the punishment, we become ourselves punishers. But the weird part is that we learn to recompense once and only one for a well-done job, and in the other hand we judge a tiny mistake millions of times. And, in fact, no one knows our goals as we do, so one must remember that he takes things personally, he would be allowing an exterior concept to define him. People say their opinions about us. And when we say "their" we mean what belongs to them and has nothing to do with us. But, since each if us sees himself as the hero of his story, he wishes that the characters respect his expectations. Ego again. We’ve learned that we don’t have to continue to hold the harmful beliefs society has taught us and what our lives can look like when we’re free—now, let’s explore how to shed those beliefs and achieve freedom. Since we mustuse symbols to represent knowledge, and all symbols require that at least two humans agree, everything we know and believe in can only be relative truth.Not that universal truths don’t exist – a tree always exists, regardless of what you call it – but there is very little that isn’t up for grabs. We’re just so used to the symbols we know, our language, what we learn in school, the values our parents teach us, that we don’t think of them as debatable. But they are. Lesson 3: Being impeccable in your use of words allows you to use symbology to your benefit. But, even this is a choice, no one can take advantage of you if you don’t establish such a hostile relationship with yourself.

For example, what makes something right or wrong? How do you know unequivocally, that something is wrong? To achieve self-mastery, there are three things that we need to master: awareness, transformation, and faith. Note: In the guide, we’ll often refer to the authors, don Miguel Ruiz and don Jose Ruiz, as “the naguals.” Naguals, sometimes referred to as dreamers, masters, or scholars, act as a conduit between the spirit and the world, and pass on the teachings of the Toltec—whom the Ruizes say were the intellectual and cultural predecessors of the Aztec. To them, a Toltec is an artist of the spirit: a master storyteller who paints his own reality.)

One of the primary ways is through language. We begin using words to allocate meaning to the symbols and objects around us. A toddler will point to an object and assign the prescribed word that she has been taught. She will be praised if she uses the "correct" word. Once we learn to use words, we create language. In short, the naguals contend that our perception of reality—and therefore the way we think, feel, and behave—changes based on what we believe. As we begin to challenge and overcome the false “truths” we accepted as children, we grow progressively freer. By the time we grow up, our faith is already invested in so many lies that we hardly have any power left to create the dream we want to create." This book is not just a review of the four agreements plus the fifth. It IS a re-statement of the first four agreements, but in much more detail and in more common language. I first became aware of the Toltec wisdom through Carlos Castaneda's series "the teachings of Don juan..." and they were impressive yet they seemed a distant unreachable wisdom in some far off world/ time shrouded in mystery etc. Then Merylin Tenneshende's book "Don Juan and the art of sexual energy" took the next step toward making the wisdom more tangible for the masses.In The Four Agreements, don Miguel Ruiz revealed how the process of our education, or “domestication,” can make us forget the wisdom we were born with. Throughout our lives, we make many agreements that go against ourselves and create needless suffering. The Four Agreements help us to break these self-limiting agreements and replace them with agreements that bring us personal freedom, happiness, and love. When we use words impeccably, we only allow them to improve our lives, not be destructive. This starts with the words you choose and ends with the degree of relative truth you assign to words from others. The goal here is to, like the toddler you once were, not judge or reject yourself for who you are. At the same time, when others insult you, see their words as just symbols, their truth, not yours, and you’ll better be able to let it wash away. Don’t believe yourself or anybody else unconditionally. Use the power of doubt to question everything you hear: Is it really the truth? Listen to the intent behind the words and you will understand the real message. Not even your parents are entitled to criticize your decisions because the power lies within you – no one can make that final push on your behalf. Not exactly the same What we share with one another is just our perception; it is just our point of view. And it's completely normal because the only thing we have is our point of view.