Want to be Spanked?

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One-quarter (27%) said their preferred pain propelled them into a trance-like altered state involving deep relaxation, almost mystical contentment, a sensation of floating outside their bodies achieving oneness with the universe. Subs have a word for this—“subspace.” “It’s meditative.” “I feel all floaty and spacey.” “I go on ‘vacation’ mentally to a place where I feel everything but nothing hurts.” In talking to your boyfriend, you can always opt for the direct approach, which is to say something like "Hey boyfriend, I am curious about how it would feel to be spanked during sex. Are you comfortable trying that?" If he says yes, then you can proceed from there. If he says no, or otherwise indicates that he's not into the idea, then spanking will remain a fantasy only activity for the time being. When I was 21, right after I graduated from college, I began dating Brandon, a brilliant, charismatic, confident 22-year-old. I loved how his dominant, even arrogant, personality manifested itself between the sheets. (Really, the only place I could put up with such a personality.) I didn’t have to ask for him to spank or dominate me because he did it naturally, and I didn’t feel like I was “choosing” to be submissive. But when we broke up after nine months, I knew I wanted the next guy I dated to be dominant in bed, like Brandon had been. I did a little Googling about submission and spanking fetishes and discovered it was a lot of other people’s fetishes, as well. Hello everyone I’m another husband who’s wife is a firm believer in spanking a naughty boy on a school theme as she insists I wear a school uniform shorts included she loves being the firm ,strict headmistress and has a mortar board and gown her motto reads “well my boy if you act like a spoilt graft you will be spanked like one.

This is about your recent response to UNCUT, the guy who met men who believed they were uncut when they were very much cut. You suggested that these men were lying about being uncircumcised. But not knowing might be more common than we assume. This is from Epidemiology , the authoritative textbook written by Leon Gordis of the Johns Hopkins School of Public Health: “They asked a group of men whether or not they had been circumcised. The men were then examined by a physician. Of the 56 men who stated they were circumcised, 19, or 33.9 percent, were found to be uncircumcised. Of the 136 men who stated they were not circumcised, 47, or 34.6 percent, were found to be circumcised. These data demonstrate that the findings from studies using interview data may not always be clear-cut.” —Some Truly Are Thrown I never told any of my girlfriends about my fetish, although I often made clumsy attempts to engage in spanking play. If they let me, I landed a few gentle slaps to the bottom until I got a curled lip and, "That's just weird. You don't really want to hurt me, do you?" Reclaiming or relinquishing power through the act of spanking may help some people regain psychological control over past traumatic events.Subs enjoy only clearly specified sensations. Like everyone else, even the most submissive subs hate dog bites, sprained ankles, or street assaults. They crave only what they personally enjoy. Not that that stopped us. No, we were selfish: Charles cheated on his girlfriend with me. But those few weeks were sexually charged, passionate and wonderful. And other than feeling guilt about the cheating, I didn’t feel ashamed about what we were doing. Getting spanked and dominated in bed by an enthusiastic partner was the most sexually liberating feeling of my entire life. If you decide that you do want to try spanking, then it's time for a discussion with your boyfriend. I know you're worried about embarrassing yourself, but if you want to explore your desires, you are going to have to talk to him. If it helps, know that sharing what our sexual desires are with a partner, even if they don't share them or want to try them, is one of the ways we develop and sustain intimacy in sexual relationships. Thinking about my own sometimes rowdy, and sometimes tender, sex life, I had to smile at the irony of a spanking. We don't hit our kids, so there would be some serious explaining to do if my son ever walking in on Rex disciplining me across his knees. And, at 6'1, I would feel kind of stupid. "Oh, Rex, slap my butt. But first, can you be a doll and get me a pillow for my legs? They're dragging on the hard wood." (Not * Whether I personally lean toward a good spanking or not you'll never know. * This is an advice column, TATER. People send in questions; I answer those questions. So I’m not pushing my views on anyone here. I’m sharing my views. That’s literally my job. And I’m not the first advice columnist to urge a cheater to withhold the truth from a partner: “The adulterer who wants to ‘set everything right’ by telling all would be better advised to keep his mouth shut and work out his guilt by behaving in a more thoughtful, loving, considerate way and stay out of other beds in the future.” That’s from The Ann Landers Encyclopedia, which was published in 1978. (Ann assumes all adulterers are male; I guess she could also be accused of “taking sides.”)

Labrecque, F., et al. (2020). What is so appealing about being spanked, flogged, dominated, or restrained? Answers from practitioners of sexual masochism/submission. Stress release: Individuals may find similar benefits from spanking therapy as those from mindful activities, such as meditation.One-third (37%) said they enjoyed feeling pain within their specified limits. “Bad pain—stubbing my toe. Good pain—my dom flogging me.” “I’ve always liked over-exercising because it hurts.” Spanking was a particular favorite. It can be easily regulated—a hand in an oven mitt, a bare hand, a flogger, or paddle. And spanking can easily combine intense sensation with submissiveness and role-playing—the naughty child, the disobedient student or employee. In your reply to SADSON, you are clearly taking sides based on how comfortable you must be about withholding the truth from a partner. You say the father should have “kept his mouth shut” about the affair he had! You know nothing about this couple’s values and decisions! Who are you to push your views on others? Many of us consider lying about cheating reprehensible! And the last sentence of your response (“I hope there were other women”) was astonishingly juvenile, mean-spirited, and vindictive—and for what reason? To take sides against a clearly tormented heterosexual woman! Disgusting and shameful! —Thoroughly Appalling Take Enrages Reader Even though my sex life is the best it has ever been, it’s more important to me that I’ve figured out how I define my feminism for myself. The thrills of a dom/sub relationship might not work for other women and men who use the same “feminist” label that I do, but I’m not worrying about them anymore. I know I can enjoy a bedroom dynamic which, outside the bedroom, wouldn’t be acceptable. And I can still call myself a feminist. I’m a straight guy but my whole life I have wanted to be spanked by older men. Does this make any sense? Because I’m confused. I don’t like or want penis, yet I want to be spanked as a punishment by men. I don’t understand myself sometimes. —Sincerely Pondering And Not Knowing In the meantime, I’m grateful she’s been so game. Later at the dinner party, our naughty server Melanie dropped a dessert spoon into my lap, and it was too symbolic to ignore. So yes, I spanked her. And my darling wife raised Melanie's crisp little skirt for me.

Those feelings are understandable, particularly given some of the messages you may have received about this. Answer: I’m usually well behaved for a month or two after a good domestic discipline session. There are three kinds of spankings she normally gives: Impromptu swats for spur of the moment infractions (usually just a handful of swats), Attitude adjustments (these are more dedicated spankings where I’ve earned swats for doing or not doing something but haven’t quite earned a trip to the woodshed), and then of course “ Woodshed Whuppin’s” (these are the worst of the worst and happen about every 1 and a half to 2 months). So, how can you know which sources to trust? The best approach is to use the guidelines in the article below about finding safe, sound sex education to help you figure out who actually knows what they're talking about. That way, any remaining nerves you may have won't be made worse by the worry that you might get hurt in an unintentional and unfun way. Over the next several months she spanked my regularly. The spankings were something I tried to avoid as they invariably left marks and made it uncomfortable to sit for a day or two. I relate. As a man, though, it's a little different -- we're not supposed to hurt women, we're supposed to protect them. I've never hit a woman in my life, and abhor those who do, including those who emotionally abuse their partners. That's the essence of my shame, deepened by the impossibility of trying to explain it to someone who is not a spanko, someone who isn't wired to understand. As Keenan said:Safewords give subs control over all play. Despite subs’ nominal subservience, the core irony of BDSM play is that the subs are always in charge, thanks to safe words. If subs feel uneasy, they might say “yellow light,” meaning they’d like to stay in role but discuss their ambivalence. If subs feel threatened, they might say “red light.” Role-playing ends. The action stops. And participants reconsider their agreements. You are my wife. I love you, I love you way too much to allow you to disregard our agreement on the best way for you to improve your health and put yourself in jeopardy. I care enough about you to put some boundaries and guidelines around you to keep you safe. And yes I will wear you out if necessary to show you just how serious I am about my love for you.” According to an article in The Journal of Sex Research, people may engage in spanking therapy for a range of reasons, such as :